Calling Me... Home.

I have been called many things in my life, and in that time, I have also been called to do many things I wasn't quite ready or necessarily equipped to accomplish.  However, it was in the process of accepting the calling that I realized that God didn't expect me to have it all figured out.  He only wanted me to answer His calling.

Per His calling, I have knelt at an altar and begged for forgiveness of my sins.  I have ended relationships that He didn't approve.  I have walked away from friendships that weren't good for me.  I have resigned from what I thought were perfect positions because God had even better things planned.  I have started what-seemed-strange-to-others projects, felt burdened to make random phone calls, and was led to go from single to engaged in eight days to my pastor.  These things wouldn't have been possible without God.

I stand in a place of calling again...  except this time, God is calling me to a place that I already am.  I understand fully how weird that sounds, but the Lord is leading me HOME.

In 2008, He made it clear that I was to leave my wonderful teaching position to come home, but it didn't make sense to me at the time.  I wasn't coming home to babies.  In fact, I had just miscarried our first child.  I was heartbroken, but I realized His calling was more important than my understanding.  In my own will, I enrolled in a Master's program, but just in time, God answered that misstep of mine with a positive pregnancy test.  I stayed home with all three of our sons and have been blessed by that opportunity!  In 2013, as our first born was about to enter pre-kindergarten in his Mother's Day Out program, his director actually asked me to take on the position as the pre-K teacher.  While I didn't think anything of it at first, my husband and I knew God wanted me to, so I accepted the position.  I loved teaching my son and my friends' children!  I saw firsthand how important the younger years were and how valuable instilling godly traits into our children was in that first year there.

The start to this school year (2014) was no different.  I was teaching pre-K, and our second son was in my class.  Our energetic first born started Kindergarten, and I was so excited for him that I could bust, having been a former Kindergarten teacher.  It came as a surprise when he didn't enjoy school...  he focused intently on the behavior chart, the language and attitudes of others, and questioned his own self.  My heart became burdened.  I couldn't understand why he didn't love the thing I adored...  until I began to pray.

Our son would make statements about wanting me to be his teacher, wishing he was still in my class, using our dinner table as our "school" table, etc.  I didn't know where he was getting these ideas, but I began to listen to what he was saying rather than ignore them.  I also started listening to what God was saying.  He was making His ways clear and His paths for our family straight, but I didn't want to see them.

I continued teaching pre-K and sending our son to Kindergarten, but he'd wake in tears and come home with attitude and changed behavior.  I know without a doubt God was using these things to change my heart, because He knew how much this teacher likes school.  He was helping me to see that I needed to love my children and God's needs for them MUCH more.

Through the month of December 2014, I heard God calling.  He was calling me away from my treasured position at Mother's Day Out.  He was calling our family away from public school which I support as a former educator.  God was calling me home.  He was calling me to step out in faith to homeschool our children, trust Him with our education, and believe that He can help me to teach and train them diligently as instructed in Deuteronomy 6:4-7:

The LORD our God, the LORD is one.  You shall love the LORD your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your might.  And these words that I command you today shall be on your heart.  You shall teach them diligently to your children, and shall talk of them when you sit in your house, and when you walk by the way, and when you lie down, and when you rise.

So, I listened to the Lord.  I resigned from my position at MDO in January 2015 with the best response I could have ever imagined from our beloved director and friend.  I enrolled our son in a homeschool academy and purchased curriculum.  I informed his public school and teacher who were extremely understanding.  I have seen God orchestrate all of the details to perfection.

It hasn't been easy on my heart though, and I am sure the journey I have ahead of me will be a challenging one.  However, I have chosen obedience when I begin to question His plan.  I have decided to rest in His peace and let His Word comfort me when the idea of homeschooling becomes overwhelming.  The best place I have found in all of this is in the center of God's will, and for me right now, I realize that He is calling me...  to come HOME.

Now, That's a Rash.

In the middle of March, out of nowhere in Sam's one afternoon, Samuel broke out in a rash on his face.  I have always known that his skin is extremely sensitive, so I've made our own detergent for years now.  However, while sitting at Sam's, his face continued to get welps all over his cheek.  By the time we gave him Benadryl and got home, we had a full on rash, all over his body.  It was on his chest and stomach, all over his face, and in the folds of his arms.  

The next day, symptoms continued, but didn't seem to bother him at all.  What really irritated him was all the attention this "rash" was getting him!

A few days and a doctor visit later, the welp rash subsided and these red spots came up all over his face.

... and they just kept spreading.

The next day, the red spots were more noticeable and a bit scary to him.

We saw the doctor again who wasn't really sure of the cause since it was essentially two separate rashes all together, maybe more.  He referred us to an allergy specialist.  While waiting for that appointment, we had another round of welps/welts.

Finally, we saw the allergist, and he refused to test Samuel because of his extremely sensitive skin.  He even did a "test" to see how Samuel's skin would react to being touched.  He took the tip of his pen (the pen was closed) and ran it down Samuel's arm.  Within seconds, his arm was red and had a long, large welp where the pen had been.  We were told to give Samuel two different medications daily to help this disorder, called dermatographism, and come back in two weeks to see if his skin improved.  I took him to Dairy Queen after being poked on at the allergist's office, expecting he'd want ice cream.  Instead, he chose a hot dog and was thrilled with his pick!

I also took him shopping with me, and let him choose one thing to take home with him.  Of all the things he could have chosen, this sweet kiddo chose marshmallows.  He fell asleep on the ride home.

We returned to the doctor after two weeks, and the skin was still easily irritated.  We're on a nasal spray and two medications daily now, but hoping that the doctor's diagnosis and dermatographism and low-grade sinusitis will continue to get better with time!

This is Big. Daniel is 5.

Daniel is 5.

I just cannot wrap my mind around that fact, not one bit.

In his 5th year, Daniel:
Weighed 44 lbs.
Wore a size 12 1/2 shoe.
Was in size 4T, 4, and 5T clothes.
Was in 50th percentile in height and weight.

In May:
Went to West TN to visit family.
Celebrated his cousin Karlee's birthday.
Played in Mema's big Jacuzzi tub.
Was in his Mother's Day Out closing program.
Was dressed in a cowboy hat and bandana.
Had his last day of Mother's Day Out.
Loved watching our 1st family garden grow.
He was VERY interested in it!
Was a big helper when his baby brother...
    had to have a GI probe placed for 24 hrs.
Painted a spring painting for Mimi on Mother's Day.
Celebrated Elias' 1st birthday!
Liked being in the backyard.
Sometimes, we'd find him naked out there playing.
Loved when it rained, leaving a mud pit in the yard.
He could always be found splashing through it!
Went bowling for the 1st time for Samuel's bday.
Went strawberry picking with friends and family.

In June:
Went to Touch a Truck Day in Goodlettsville.
Really enjoyed the John Deere Gator and police car.
Got his very 1st bike with training wheels.
It was a green and black Hot Wheels bike.
Was the first to try something from our garden.
It was a beet.
He didn't like it at all.
Loved all things water.
Attended Victory's Running the Race VBS.
He adored it!
Had his 1st dental visit.  Did great!

In July:
Cousin James Evan came to stay with us!
Played with James in the backyard water pit!
Went to his 1st carnival.
Went swimming in the Ball's pool!
Tried swimming on his own.
Dressed up as a cow for Chick Fil A Day!
His sign said, "Winner, Winner, Chicken Dinner,"
   and he says that all the time.
Went fishing with Grandpa.
Caught his 1st fish.
Traveled to Missouri for a youth weekend.
Went to a minor league Cardinals game.
Came home with a game ball!
Loved playing with Lincoln
   and holding Mikaylen.
Enjoyed catching the rolls at Lambert's.
Was in AWE at Bass Pro Shops.
Got an ice cream cone at Andy's.  YUM.
Jumped into a pool all by himself
   at a youth event in Missouri...
   without anyone knowing it.
Said goodbye to Lincoln.
Went to Dyersburg to drop James off,
   and saw Aunts Pattie and Dina.
Cried when we had to leave James.
Called James before we got on the interstate...
   because "I miss you so much."

In August:
Started Pre-K at Temple MDO.
Mrs. Jenna (mom) was his teacher!

In September:
Traveled to Indiana to stay with the Shives.
Loved Celeste and family!
Went to a petting zoo and touched a goat.
Rode a horse.  Looked at chickens and llamas.
Sang "10,000 Reasons" in front of a roomful
   while Mrs. Celeste playing piano.
Was an amazing little singer.
Celebrated Mimi's 55th birthday!
Took Dad to Donuts with Dad at MDO.
Had a BLAST at Addy's carnival party!
Won his 1st pet, a goldfish he named Josh,
   after my friend and state rep, Joshua Evans.
Got his very own bunk bed!
Sleeps at the top!
Was so excited to have Brother James visit.
Brother James brought Mary with him!
Daniel loved her!
They brought Daniel a stuffed sled dog,
   and he still sleeps with "Balto."

In October:
Took a lot of bike rides.
Went to Baby Josie's party.
Helped open all of her gifts.
Went to the circus with Jessica and family.
Really liked the clown, Cabbage,
   and got his autograph.
Had fire safety day at MDO.
LOVED the fire truck to no end.
Celebrated Grandpa's birthday.
Then went for Aunt Cathy's 50th birthday...
   Party at Kabuto!
He loved the fire and watching them cook.
Hugged all over Cathy.
Was all about pumpkins.
Was excited when Mom made him a pumpkin shirt.
Decided he wanted to dress up like the Tin Man...
   we got on a Wizard of Oz kick, all thanks to
   McDonald's happy meals.
(We aren't fans of Halloween, but we do allow
them to go to their MDO's church's Trunk or Treat.)
Mom was Dorothy, Daniel was Tin Man,
   Samuel was the Scarecrow, and Elias the Lion.

In November:
Took our family trip to Pigeon Forge.
Loved our cabin with lots of stairs and games.
Rode the Skywheel with Samuel and Mom.
Had MDO Thanksgiving with Pop and GranJu.
Went back to Pigeon Forge for Called Out singing.
LOVED being with the crazy girls.
Saw the first bit of snow for the season.
Celebrated Thanksgiving at Mimi's.
Helped Mommy make Turkey Cookies.

In December:
Always dressed up in Mom's boots.
Was fascinated by Christmas lights.
Got his Ninja Turtle van with turtles.
Mimi got him the Thomas track he'd wanted:
   Quest for the Crown.  He loves it!
Enjoyed time with family.

In January:
Liked listening to Daddy read bibles.
Had Muffins with Mom at MDO.
Loved dancing in the living room.
Always wanted Daddy to hook his computer
   up to the t.v. and play worship songs.
Celebrated Mommy's 31st birthday!
Made his own grocery store out of
   cardboard boxes.  Hilarious.
Adored going to church.
Started liking olives.
His Oo week MDO journal had an
   octopus, oatmeal, and black olives.

In February:
Was all about tickling people.
Helped with Addy's Crafts for Cuties.
Dyed a LOT of noodles for necklaces.
Did NOT want to wear his pjs on Pajama Day.
Loved riding in the sled.
Fell with Mommy in Sam's parking lot.
Wrote his name perfectly!
Got all dressed up for Valentine's Day.
Asked specifically to go on a date...
   to none other than Cracker Barrel.
Asked to sing a song by himself at MDO
   during chapel.  Sang "Not for a Moment",
   a worship song by Meredith Andrews.
Signed up for soccer.
Had his first COLD practice.

In March:
Got our big snow/ice of the season.
Had his first soccer game!
Scored his first goal for the team!
Next game, he scored again.
Third game, he scored AGAIN!
Saw his first theater movie, Frozen.
Likes all things tractors and ninja turtles.
Is a big fan of playdoh and bubble gum.
Loved his green and yellow bday countdown.
Tells everyone his birthday is months away,
   although it's only days.
Likes to give lots of details.
Loves to tell stories and be heard.
Wants to be in control.
Cannot be still.
Fights a nap, but still needs one.
Is having a joint John Deere party with brothers.
Wants ninja turtle cupcakes for his class party.
Is busy all the time.

In April:
Started his 5th birthday countdown!
Played a lot of soccer and scored a lot of goals.
Won a game!
Did a LOT of egg hunting.
Turned 5 on Easter!
Celebrated at Mimi's house.
Opened presents and Easter baskets.
Got a My Spy Birdhouse and Ninja Turtle stuff.
Had his 5th year well check up/visit.
Had to get his finger poked for blood.
Celebrated his 5th birthday at MDO with friends.
Chose a BLUE #5 for his number from Mom.
Asked specifically for Ninja Turtle cupcakes for school.
Was amazed when Mom made them herself!

His favorites are:
Color:  Blue and Rainbow (all of them)
Food:  Apples, Blueberries, Raspberries
Restaurant:  Taco Bell, Chick fil A, Cracker Barrel
Toy:  Transformers Rescue Bots, John Deere, and Ninja Turtles (TMNT)
TV Show:  Rescue Bots and TMNT
Movie:  Frozen
Person:  Grandpa
Song:  Not for a Moment by Meredith Andrews (he calls it After All)
Thing to Do:  Playing in the Dirt, Soccer, Backyard Baseball, Riding His Bike, Going Outside, Blowing Bubbles, Running, Staying Up Late, Having One-on-One Attention
Birthday Gift:  Play-Doh, TMNT Master Splinter, Boulder the Rescue Bot, My Spy Birdhouse