Sweet

You want to know what is super sweet?

Daniel.

He really is. 

Let me explain...

As of late, Daniel becomes very concerned the very second Samuel wakes from his naps.  He announces, "Mommy, Samuel awake.  He's cryin'."  He will say this over and over until I follow him into the boys' room to get Samuel from his crib.  Sweet, right?!

Daniel's vocabulary is booming.  Some of the sweetest things he says right now are:  "I love you."  (he still hasn't told Mommy he loves her.)  "I sorry, Mommy."  "Help me, please."  The lines, "Jesus loves me this I know for the BI-ble tells me so."  Oh, and he sings, "Joy, Joy, Where?!," from I've got the joy, joy, joy, joy down in my heart, where?! song.  I'm telling you, these are so sweet!

Tonight, on our way home from revival, I suggested that Brian roll down the windows in the car to make some "white noise" to ease a very fussy Samuel.  Moments later, Samuel was silent, and Daniel was as well.  I turned to find Daniel with his hand blowing in the wind and a huge grin across his sweet face.  He was so excited!

But, honestly, the sweetest thing about Daniel is his love of physical touch.  When we lay him in his bed at night, he wants one of us to stay right beside his bed, and then he'll stick his arm through the toddler bed railing to hold our hands.  When he has done something by himself (like build a mega block tower or connected every single one of his train tracks together), Daniel will grab my hand, lead me to his creation, stand beside me, hand in hand, and very proudly point.  He blows kisses to whoever we are leaving.  He hugs his brother and tickles him endlessly.  AND, just tonight, as he was falling asleep, rubbed my hair until he couldn't stay awake any longer... 

But I'll be blunt here and tell you that Daniel isn't always sweet.  He just might be the most challenging child I've ever faced in my life.  In fact, he has learned how to push my buttons like no one else and has even caused me to lose my temper like I will never admit.  I find myself angrier than I care to get and more impatient with each passing hitting or pushing incident, terrible two tantrum, and disobedient move he makes.  He tends to bring out my worst qualities on most days.

However, I am reminded constantly, through this little child, that I have been given the awesome opportunity from God to raise him.  I honestly believe, on some days, he is raising me.  He is teaching me to be calmer and less temperamental.  He shows me that laughter is better than anger, and messes only last for a short while.  One day, I'll miss his tantrums and hearing him say, "I sorry, Mommy," after he's had a timeout.  I am learning that I cannot grow as a parent OR a person without these teachable moments from my child.  The negative habits and dramatic personality I see in Daniel are ones I've passed down to him, and I am being forced to change so that he will see more of Christ and less of me.

There isn't anything sweet about me.  Except for this great, big fact...   God is sweet on me (and you).  He is incredibly good to me.  He's given me a heart that longs for Him, and because of that, I am constantly being molded to look more like Christ.  Why is this so important?  Well, there is a little set of eyes that imitates most everything he sees his Mommy do, and God knows that if He can use Mommy to win this little boy to Him, then it will all be worth it.  Daniel's heart could one day love like Christ, and hopefully, I can be what God used to get him to that point. 

I imagine years from now I'll look back on these days and will have forgotten the frustrating times.  I'll be able to see past all the things that were so difficult about raising Daniel.  I'll realize that it was God's way of raising me to look more like His Son.  I'll understand that without the child-rearing pains, there would be no gains.  Most importantly, I hope to remember how sweet it was to be Daniel's Mommy and how deeply I was/am loved by the King.