Everyday brings about feelings I didn't know I could have about this boy. I could have had them years ago, but I forced myself not to. I wish I hadn't, but now I know that God had different plans because I need this particular boy as he needs me at this particular place in time.
We've spent the past week or two getting used to each other again, seeing how we've changed, being adults, and realizing that we have strong feelings for one another. Getting used to liking him is something that's so easy, but in the grand scheme of things, I want to control the situation and say that I do not want to be in a relationship. At this point, I will take whatever God is willing to give me. I like him and I trust God that much.
Tonight was different though. Tonight was the night we admitted to really liking each other. We hadn't done that before. He called while I was at my family's 4th celebration and he on the way home from his, and we talked for a good twenty minutes. Of course, as it always does, my mouth gets ahead of my mind, and I say, "This is weird." He asks what I meant by it. I told him that I thought "we" were weird now, that we weren't the same. He said, "Yeah, we're not, and I like that." I asked him what he meant. "This is what I've always wanted, and now you want it too." That's what I wanted him to say back in high school, that he liked me... Without doubt, I have my affirmation, and it feels good knowing he feels the same way.
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