I Didn't Know You'd Be The Best Birthday Present

Every year I make a list of all the things I want for my birthday, but this year deemed no list. I only want one thing, and that one thing this year is a guitar. I've been saying for years that I need to truly learn how to play. I hate not being able to sit down and vent in the only way I know how... through music. How awesome it would be if I could focus all of my energy in learning to do something I have come to appreciate. Of all the gifts I could have, all I really want is the gift of music... Oh, and I wouldn't mind a cake.

So with this in mind, I've asked for nothing but money this year and the company of my friends, and tonight was to be Girls' Night Out for my 23rd birthday. Somehow I knew that none of us would follow through, myself included. This whole working for real thing is killing me, and I guess what makes the teaching thing even worse is that I'm not getting paid. I have no desire to spend money. I JUST WANT THAT GUITAR. Or so I thought.

Funny what an early brithday phone call will do for you... I don't ever think to ask for things that I really WANT like a certain talk with an old friend. I never guessed that talking to him would make me feel like I do: giddy and excited to relive and renew what we once had. I don't know what it meant, and if it will matter in a few weeks, months, or years, but I hope that he meant what he said just like I knew he always did. I missed him, and as crazy as it sounds, I want it to be the way it was. No, I'm not asking for a boy on my birthday, but I really am hoping for some sort of closure or for a door to be reopened... He brought this certain artist up tonight, and here's a song that says how I'm feeling:

"Because I'm not here to be around,
and be that girl that you forget about.
Because all I want is just to be a song
That you can feel longer than just right now.
So, come on baby, let me be the girl,
That you can count on to rock your world,
And then you'll see there's so much than curves...
And then you'll see that you and me belong."